Now I already know that this is not going to be a popular review. But in the interests of honesty and true transparency I just had to write it. However much everyone on the island loves it, I just cannot bring myself to like Surfside. The location is great but thats about the most positive statement I can muster about this restaurant/cafe.

Firstly the scruffly plastic menus. They’re peeling and falling apart and are just gross gross gross. Not only do they look crappy, the prices are just insane. Yes Zlatan Ibrahimovic is a chicken curry for €13.90. I go red about the face and begin shaking whenever I think of this- it’s insulting to expect people to pay that!

But Joe told me to be reasonable and perhaps the quality of the food made up for the shoddy menu and justified the prices. It didn’t.

I went for the Ryan Fenech which was supposed to be bolognais. And whilst it didn’t specify ‘spaghetti bolognais’ usually waiters will ask you for your preference. And my preference with bolognais is always spaghetti. There was about a tablespoon of mince, a huge slab of parmesan and some kind of cheese sauce. Meh.

Joe and Nanny R went for the fillet of beef with pepper and diane sauce respectively. It was really  just a lump of fatty meat cooked until it was black. The waiting staff asked how they wanted it done (Joe- medium rare, Nanny- medium well done) and both looked exactly the same- why ask if you’re going to ignore it?? The only smell wafting from the kitchen was that of burning and smoke which is never appetising. Although it’s true they both got a huge plateful and the chips were actually alright, the beef was just horrific. Tough, burnt and unappealing on the eye.

The waiting staff also practically ignored us the entire time. Once the food had come out they didn’t once come and ask if everything was ok with our meal or even as much as glance in our direction.

Apart from the random splashes of sporting paraphernalia and decor and the odd peeling bit of wallpaper, it actually looks quite nice inside and the view is lovely. It literally sits on the rocky beach so on a sunny day you would be bathed in sunlight and watching the crystal clear sea. When we went it was stormy and it was just as much fun to watch the waves and have them hitting the glass next to you!

With my food I also had a hot chocolate which was very reasonable at just €1.50 and actually very nice. It was sweet and chocolaty and apart from the company it was the best part of the meal.

So overall the location and hot chocolate is wonderful. However the prices are disgusting, the food mediocre at best and the waiting staff inattentive.

If you’ll be sunbathing along the flat rocks near Surfside this Winter I thoroughly recommend walking a few moments down the road to somewhere (ANYWHERE) else or taking your own little picnic!